The Hardy Brothers

We Might Tell

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Dear Frank and Joe, I have been reading your column since its inception, often in great excitement. ‘These two guys know so much!’ I always ejaculate to myself. But I sometimes feel crestfallen when finishing another pithy, salacious jaunt through the world of Hardy. After all, one can only apply the knowledge one accrues from…

Practical Tips for Going Dionysian Over Spring Weekend

the hardy brothers

This week in The Hardy Brothers: Special Edition, we bring you a menu of sex, drugs, rock ‘n’ roll and other delightful things to guide, inspire and, of course, help you plan your Spring Weekend meals (just like The Joy of Cooking, only with controlled substances, music and f*cking in place of food). This weekend…

I’ll Have What She’s Not Having

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Dear Hardy Brothers, I think my girlfriend digs it when I go down on her, but I’ve started to suspect that she’s faking orgasms. How can I tell? Much love, Porfirio Rubirosa JOE: Is your girlfriend in love with you, P.R.? If so, she’s more likely to be faking, argues Emory Economics graduate student Hugo…

Pretty Girls Make Graves

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Dear Hardy Brothers, I’ve been casually hooking up with this boy (lots of heavy making out, but no sex yet) and recently decided I want to put a stop to it before it goes there. The problem is we’re not dating, we’ve made no commitments to each other, and we’ve never discussed our “relationship” before,…

Dominatrix in Training

staying on top

Dear Hardy Brothers, I am a dominant chick, but worried that my attitude in the bedroom might emasculate the males that come my way. How can I get boys to submit without making them run away? Who’s Your Daddy, Dominatrix in Training Frank: Well, my pet—oh wait, that would be me in this situation. My…